Lame Quote of the Year
think we are going to win the West", Charlie "Meats"
Monfort, owner and
CEO of the Rockies, April 4 (Opening Day), 2005.
One more from Charlie "Chuckles"
"I know that a lot
of teams would like to have the nucleus of players and fan support we have."
(Maybe so, but the only Major League team might be Tampa Bay.
Most minor league teams above single A would probably stick with what
they have. Ed.)
Terrmel (Sister) Sledge, Nationals
Coco Crisp, Indians
Milton Bradley, Dodgers
Wily Mo Pena, Reds
Best Songs to Play
Way to the Game:
"Centerfield" by John Fogerty
"I Can't Help You Now" by Bonnie Raitt
"A lot of lies. A lot of lies. We have been told this and
told that, then nothing was done or the complete opposite was done. There
has been a lot of stuff that has happened and said from upstairs that hasn't
come true." Larry Walker, as quoted in the Denver Post.
Rockies Trade for Clemens, Giambi
Biggest Deal in Franchise History
April 1, 2005. The Colorado Rockies announced early this morning
that they had acquired the services of future Hall of Famers
Roger Clemens from Houston and slugger Jason Giambi from the
Yankees. Todd Helton, Matt Holiday, Preston Wilson, and Garret
Atkins will be sent to the Astros, while pitchers Jeff Francis,
Jason Jennings, Shawn Chacon, and Joe Kennedy will be dispatched
to New York as part of the deal. The Rockies also agreed to
continue paying the salaries of all players involved.
"To heck with the future, we want to win now!" exclaimed
Rockies' owner "Meats" Monford.
In related stories, Clemens and Giambi announced their
retirements from baseball, effective immediately.
Former Rockies Announcer Admits Steroid Use
Tried to divert attention by accusing Helton.
Wayne Hagin admitted he was only able to announce Rockies games
from 1993 through 2003 by getting hopped up on "the juice".
"There was no way I could have maintained that level of mindless
chatter without massive doses of artificial stimulants. I just
didn't have the strength or the brain power without them," the
broken pundit sobbed at a hastily-called press conference in St.
Louis Monday. He went on to admit that he was still ingesting
massive doses of the illegal drug and only accused Rockies'
first baseman Todd Helton of doing the same in order to send
investigators on a wild goose chase.
When told that Helton said he would never speak to him again,
Wayne said "He never said much when he was talking to me
anyway," as he offered this reporter a joint (refused,
politely). "I couldn't keep it up without this (holding up a
baggie of weed), or this!", waving three open bottles of his
employer's most popular beverage (Budweiser), freshly plucked
from what must have been at least a 100 gallon tub of ice and
"Why do you think I was always talking about the restaurants and
hinting that the proprietors should deliver some of their
products to the booth? The weed and 'roids give you a terrific
appetite", he said, munching on several hot dogs while he licked
cheese sauce from the top of a gigantic order of nachos. "A few
of these keep me awake and keep the lips flapping too!", the
dizzy sportscaster exclaimed as he dumped a half bottle of pills
down is craw from a bottle with someone else's name typed on the
you didn't pay very close attention to the game?" asked a
reporter in the back of the room. Hagin threw an unopened bottle
of Bud in the general direction of the reporter as he exclaimed
in his trademark whiny, high pitched voice: "Game, hell! Half
the time we didn't even know who was playing."
Suddenly grown surly, the erratic announcer signalled the end of
further dialog with an obscenity-riddled tirade of how the
entire free press distorted everything, anyway, apparently
forgetting that group included himself.
For those of you who haven't
guessed, the above article is an attempt at satire, aimed at
directing the same misinformation in the direction of Mr. Hagin
that he directed toward Todd Helton earlier this month.
Burnitz Not a Good Fit
December 22, 2003. The Rockies signed Jeremy Burnitz to take the
place of Jay Payton as the starting left fielder.
On the positive side, Burnitz has shown power throughout his career,
averaging just over 30 homers a year since coming up with the Mets
Now for the negative....
Read the rest of the story
Season Ticket Prices Frozen by Rockies for Fifth Straight Year
Remember supply and demand? To refresh your memory, it goes like this:
When the demand for goods exceeds the supply, prices rise until
Conversely, when supply exceeds demand, prices drop,
thereby stimulating demand.
The goal is for supply to equal demand,
resulting in the best return for both buyers and sellers.....
the rest of the story
September 11, 2005. If there is
one thing that is ruining baseball in Denver it is sports
"writers" at the Denver Post, especially "Humidor Head", better
known as Troy E. Renck (we don't know why he insists on
including his middle initial, perhaps there is a more famous
Troy Renck of whom we have never heard).
Click here to see how lame Renck
Selected "Best of the Worst" for 2006
December 31, 2005. In an article
Feeder Report" in his "Bad Altitude" Blog at
BaseballToaster.com, Mark Donohue concluded that the 2006
Rockies were the best of a bad lot. He compared them to the
Seattle Mariners, Kansas City Royals, Pittsburgh Pirates, and
Tampa Bay Devilrays.
Deserting Sinking Ship
November 6, 2005. Experienced employees
from the Colorado Rockies front office don’t seem to share the
owner's and General Manager’s unbridled enthusiasm for the
future. The best and brightest personnel are leaving for greener
pastures, and following Colorado U.S. executive office
tradition, they are mostly being replaced by cronies with little
if any qualifications for the positions.
Thad Levine left the Rockies, where he was
the Senior Director of Baseball Operations, to become Assistant
General Manager with the Texas Rangers. Levine, 33, was with the
team for 6 years. He is being replaced by Jeff Bridich, 28, who
has been with Colorado for less than a year, as Director of
Minor League Operations.
Walter Sylvester, 36, has been named to “an
assistant post in baseball operations” after working for the
team for less than a year with duties described as “analysis of
Jerry DiPoto resigned as the Rockies director of pro scouting
and was hired as director of player personnel and professional
scouting by the Arizona Diamondbacks. DiPoto himself had little
if any experience beyond pitching when he was hired by the
Rockies about a year ago, and he will not be replaced, according
to the team. Something is fishy about the whole DiPoto deal,
however, because the Rockies talked him into moving to the
announcer's booth to replace George Frazier before he up and
quit. Which is too bad, because even an Arkansas hog caller
would be an improvement over Frazier (no offense intended to AK
Dan Montgomery, who has worked in scouting
with the Rockies since the beginning (which may or may not
indicate competence), showed why he was promoted to Assistant
Director of Scouting with this concentrated flurry of
"To make the jump with this organization really means a lot
to me. I feel good about this organization, especially because
they realize that we have talented people and they do not have
to look outside to fill a job. I think that comes from Dan,
[club president] Keli McGregor and Charlie and Dick Monfort
[chairman/CEO and vice chairman, respectively]. A lot of people
have worked together for a long time; we're friends, and we know
that the people we have can do the job."
The Baseball Observer has to interject here that nobody who
is part of this organization can really lay claim to “doing the
job” in light of the overall absence of success and the steep
downward trend of the business of late. A more appropriate
statement would be “I can’t believe any of us still have jobs,
given our total lack of performance since 1993.
Some formula: hire people with no experience in the industry,
teach them how you’ve managed to build losing teams and chase
away millions of customers for the past five years, then promote
them to positions of responsibility. Yeah, that’ll work!
Minor League Player Honored
November 2, 2005. Matt Miller,
a 6'2", 210 lb. outfielder with the Asheville Tourists won the
Trautman Award in the South Atlantic League, hitting .330 with
30 homers and 100 RBIs. He was also named Most Valuable Player
in the Class A Circuit.
White Sox Win World Series
November 2, 2005. A friend of
ours mentioned this the other day, so we thought we would pass
it along. The Baseball Observer, like all true Rockies fans,
does not acknowledge the continuation of play beyond the regular
season. Until Baseball sees fit to include the Rockies in their
post season party, we will just ignore it. With no disrespect to
the White Sox as reigning world champions, of course.
Plan Becomes Evident
October 17, 2005. Everyone
knows the umpires have had it in for Major League Baseball for
some time now. A few years ago, most of them resigned as a bluff
during contract negotiations, and Baseball surprised them by
accepting. Salary talks have been hostile. Apparently the
umpires decided to strike back during the postseason this year,
with devastating success. Their plan was twofold: One, make sure
the least popular teams make the World Series. Two, make sure
that the game is so tainted by bad officiating that no one will
watch anyway. They have obviously succeeded beyond their wildest
dreams, costing Baseball (and the gambling establishment)
hundreds of millions of dollars.
Takes a Hit in ALCS Game 2
October 12, 2005. The umpire, Doug Eddings, blew a critical
call. That's not news, it happens with alarming frequency. His
actions, and the actions of Major League Baseball before,
during, and after the play, are news, and the worst possible
news for Baseball and its fans. Because it makes it look like
the MLB establishment is trying to fix games.
Here are the plain, unvarnished facts:
The Los Angeles Angel pitcher, Kelvim Escobar threw a low pitch
that the Chicago batter swung at and missed for strike three. The
catcher, Josh Paul caught the ball cleanly, rolled it toward the
mound, and jogged off the field. The umpire, Doug Eddings, indicated
that the batter had swung and it was strike three. He also made the
universal out sign of the clenched fist with the thumb extended. The
batter took several steps toward the dugout, then, because he said
he hadn't heard the umpire call him out, he ran to first base,
whereupon, Eddings called him safe.
Josh Paul thought it was a clean catch, because if he hadn't, he
would have tagged the batter, who was only a few feet away.
The umpires look suspicious in this incident, for a number of
reasons. First, it is customary for the umpire to verbally warn the
catcher if he doesn't think he caught the ball. Eddings remained
silent. Second, if he thought the ball had hit the ground, first he
should have looked at the ball to see if there was dirt on it, and
secondly, he should have asked the other umpires for help, all of whom had a
better view of the play. Doug Eddings did none of those things. When
he was finally forced to ask another umpire, he queried the third
base umpire alone, who said he was blocked and couldn't see
anything. Replays appear to show that he, in fact, had a clear,
Every impartial observer has said that it looks like a clean
catch from every angle,
"Yet in a press conference after the game with Eddings and crew
chief Jerry Crawford, Rich Reiker, MLB umpire supervisor, said
Eddings made the right call after they viewed the replay.
'We've looked at it in the truck. We've blown it up. I'm sure some
of you have seen that angle. We have some technology, and Jerry
Crawford saw it, also, the whole crew, and there was definitely a
change in direction there. At this point I would say at best it's
inconclusive. I wouldn't totally agree that the ball was caught, but
there was a change in direction there that we saw and the replay is
available to us,' he said. "
The ball did change direction after
it hit the webbing of the glove, as all caught baseballs do.
But, the most important thing to consider is why Doug Eddings
decided that the ball was not caught when he was standing behind
the catcher and had no view of it at all.
The replays at least conclusively show that it was a very
close call - without even seeing it, what made Eddings so sure
the ball was not caught? Why didn't he say, "No catch" like he
usually does? Why didn't he ask the other umpires for help? Why
didn't he check the ball for dirt? Why are all the umpires and
MLB management so intent on saying the replays show he was right
when that is obviously not the case? Why wouldn't Eddings have
just ruled it a strikeout and let the game play on? Nobody would
have raised an eyebrow, but instead he made a controversial and
unjustifiable call. Any fan who watched the game or read the
accounts has to think that there is something seriously rotten
in Major League Baseball. And they would be right.
In the Playoffs - Shawn Chacon
October 10, 2005. We don't need
to say much about Shawn Chacon, do we? The Rockies basically
gave him to the Yankees a few months ago in a salary dump
transaction, getting nothing in return. Shawn almost
single-handedly carried the Bronx Bombers into the playoffs, and
now he is giving them a chance to go on to the ALCS.
In the Playoffs - Chone Figgins
October 10, 2005. Chone
(pronounced like "Shawn") Figgins was drafted in the fourth
round in 1997. In 2001, he was traded to the Angels for
Kimera Bartee, who was hitless in 12 games for the Rockies, and
never played in the Major Leagues again. Figgins, on the other
hand, has been described as the best utility player in the game,
and is the catalyst that makes the Los Angeles Angels run. In
2003, he helped them win the World Series. In 2005, he led the
Major Leagues in stolen bases with 62, and batted .290 with 8
homeruns and 10 triples. He played all three outfield positions,
2B, 3B, shortstop and DH. Already in the playoffs, he has made
incredible defensive plays at third and in center, killing
Yankee rallies. He is better than the Rockies' starters at most,
if not all of those positions.
In the Playoffs - Brad Ausmus
October 10, 2005. The Rockies
Brass are always whining about not being able to find an
everyday catcher, and yet they had an excellent one in Brad
Ausmus of the Houston Astros and they let him get away. Brad has
caught at least 100 games in each of his 11 full Major League
seasons, and ranks 2nd in total games caught since 1996! He also
has two Gold Gloves. The Rockies drafted Ausmus from the Yankees
and immediately christened him the "catcher of the future". Then
they shuffled him off to San Diego for two bad pitchers (They
also threw in Andy Ashby, an excellent pitcher). Last night,
Brad hit the game tying homerun in the ninth inning, setting the
stage for the Astros to eliminate the Braves in an 18 inning
Factor in 2005
October 7, 2005. The Red Sox
have 2 Rockies on their 40-man roster, while the White Sox only
have one. Result: White Sox sweep series. What would you suppose
San Diego's chances are with 5 ex-Rockies to the Cardinals 2
(Cards lead 2 games to 0)? LA leads NY, 2 games to 1, and has 1
ex-Rockie to the Bronx Bomber's 2. Atlanta and Houston are tied
at 1 game apiece, but the Braves have the clear disadvantage
with 2 more ex-Colorado players than the Astros 1.
Ex-Rockies Factor) - How Will It Affect the Postseason?
October 5, 2005. Two years ago,
the ERF was an albatross that dragged down the teams with the
most former Colorado players. Last year, the trend reversed
itself as Boston won it all with a large cadre of former Blake
Street players. How will it work this year? Here are the
New York Yankees
Angeles Angels at Anaheim
Keep Holliday, Pitch Greene
October 5, 2005. Management
announced yesterday that they will be picking up the 2006 option
for Matt Holliday at a salary of $500,000. At the same time,
they declined next year's option for $800,000 for catcher Todd
Greene, instead opting for a $100,000 buyout. Colorado General
Manager "Dealin'" Dan O'Dowd said he was still interested in
bringing Greene back, with the inference that he would expect to
pay a lot less for the veteran catcher, in keeping with the
team's miserly payroll.
Baseball Observer Picks the Winners
October 3, 2005. Here are the
Angels vs. Yankees. In
the past, the Angels have had the Yankees number and it should
continue this year. Angels in 4 games.
White Sox vs. Red Sox.
It would just be too boring if the White Sox won, so the
Baseball Observer has to go with the BoSox. That way, we can see
a rematch of last year when the Bean Towners blew the
Angels away, as they probably will again this year.
Angels vs. Red Sox. The
Red Sox while show that power and emotion trump sound
fundamentals and small ball in a short series. Boston in 5.
St. Louis vs. San Diego.
It doesn't look like the Padres have a chance. The Observer
likes underdogs more than most people, but these odds are too
long. Peavy could produce a win, but St. Louis will dominate in
Atlanta vs. Houston. It
would be great if both of these teams could lose. If either one
of these teams gets to the World Series and the White Sox were
the opponent, it would be the least watched World Series in
history. Let's say Houston will win, not because they are any
good, but because their talent seems to be that their opponents
always seem to play poorly against them. Houston in 5.
St. Louis vs. Houston.
No contest. St. Louis in 5.
Boston vs. St. Louis.
Boston has been busting their guts all season long, while the
Cardinals have been cruising. This time, the Red Sox won't have
the sense of history to keep their blood boiling and will run
out of gas. Cardinals in 6.
Ends Worst Season Ever With Win
Cook impressive again in 11-3
October 2, 2005. Aaron Cook
looked like a number 1 starter, Clint Barmes and Todd Helton
went deep, and Luis Gonzalez went 3 for 5 with two RBI as
Generation R brought another nightmarish Colorado baseball
season to a close. It's a good thing they are moving to Portland
soon, Denver can't take another season like 2005. With a sub-$50
million budget scheduled for next year, the Rockies will
probably be worse in 2006. If they stayed in Denver, they could super
charge that "humidifier" so that the balls are blocks of ice and
set the record for most no-hitters in a stadium for a season.
Why not? The Commissioner doesn't seem to care what they do.
Day, Another Road Loss
Rookie Mike Esposito starts and
pitches well in 3-1 loss
October 1, 2005. Corey Sullivan
drove in the only Colorado run with a sacrifice fly as the
lethargic Rockies dropped another one on the road. The Rockies
have to win tomorrow in order to avoid having the worst record
in franchise history.
Offense continues to slumber
September 30, 2005. Matt
Holliday hit a two-run homerun, but Byung-Hyun Kim gave
up 3 runs in just under 6 innings, so the Rockies lost again.
Sunny Kim follows gem with rock
in 11-0 loss
September 29, 2005. Tom
Glavine, who pitched like this game meant something, evened his
record at 13-13 and assured the Mets would not have a losing
season. He struck out 11, walking only two, and personally had
as many hits as the Rockies team. Choo Freeman and Matt Holiday
had the only Colorado hits, both singles. Kim pitched 3
scoreless innings before he lost his stuff, ending his five game
winning streak. The Rockies are now stuck on 66 wins and need
two more to avoid matching the worst season in their history,
the 67-95 1993 team.
Rockies Come Back to Beat Braves Again
Green 3-run blast accounts for
final 6-5 margin
September 28, 2005. The Braves
started their second team and still surged to a 4-2 lead over
Jeff Francis and the Rockies. But the Colorado regulars mounted
a 15 hit attack on the Braves four minor league pitchers and won
the game and the series.
Braves Route Colorado
Aaron Cook finally has a bad
day in Atlanta in 12-3 loss
Rockies Mount a Comeback to Beat Braves
Green 3-run blast accounts for
final 6-5 margin
Last Game at Coors a Depressing Loss
Fuentes' blowup in ninth ruined
a fine effort by the other Kim
September 25, 2005. Nobody
noticed it but the Baseball Observer, of course, but the final
Major League Baseball game at Coors Field was played on a fine,
sunny but cool day Sunday. The home team lost, of course, and
only 31,746 fans watched
the last game in Colorado. Overall, the Rockies drew 1,914,389
spectators in 2005, the lowest total in their 13-year history.
The loss put their home record at 40 wins and 41 losses, their
second losing season at the park in a row and 5th overall in
what was once considered the greatest home field advantage in
Byung Hyun Kim held the Giants
to 2 runs on 7 hits over 5 innings. Jamey Wright, Scott Dohmann
and Randy Williams shut them out until the 9th, when Fuentes
blew it. Barry Bonds was 0 for 3 with two pop outs, a ground out
to Helton that he didn't bother to run out, and a walk. He was
booed loudly every time he came to the plate, and jeered as he
skulked back to the dugout. When he is elected to the Hall of
Fame in Canton, will they put his plaque in a special room where
people can press a button and hear whole stadiums boo? Or maybe
they should play the fans favorite eerie taunt that goes around
the stands whenever he does anything: "bear-eeeeee, bear-eeeeee,
Rockies Even Series With 6-0 Win Over Giants
Sunny Kim stuns Bonds and
friends with complete game 3-hit shutout
September 24, 2005. What can
you say? This was probably the greatest pitching performance in
Rockies history. Kim gave up singles to Moises Alou and Ray
Durham, a double to Pedro Feliz, and a walk to Mike Metheny.
Barry "Juice" Bonds? Kim induced him to pop out to short in the
second, line out to center in the 5th, and ground out to second
in the 7th. His first two at bats were as the leadoff hitter in
the inning, and he batted with the bases empty in his final
appearance. So, even if the flaxseed oil king had homered in
each at-bat the Rockies would have won 6-3. Kim only faced 31
batters, threw 101 pitches, and wrapped it up in an incredible 2
hours and 12 minutes.
Giants Start Series With 7-6 Win
Bullpen blows fine Jeff Francis
September 23, 2005. Jeff
Francis held the Giants to 2 runs over six innings, only to
watch from the dugout as Dohmann and DeJean gave up 5 runs on 4
hits, 2 walks, and a wild pitch. Bonds watchers were out in full
force, as attendance ballooned to 35,365. That was nearly double
the record-setting low of the previous day. Of course,
about half of the fans were only there to see the fireworks
after the game.
CO Knocks SD back to .500 in front of smallest crown in Rockies
Aaron Cook has another stellar
outing as team wins 4-2
September 22, 2005. Cook held
the Pads to 2 runs on 10 hits over 8 innings to go 6-1. Brian
Fuentes closed it out with a scoreless ninth for his 30th save.
The announced crowd on 18,119 was the smallest in Coors Field
Padres 5, Rockies 2
San Diego shows no ill effects
of previous night
September 21, 2005. Jake Peavy
and Trevor Hoffman held the Rockies to 2 runs on 8 hits a day
after Colorado scored 20 and the Padres cruised to a victory
putting them 1 game over .500 again.
Rockies 20, Padres 1
Biggest home win ever
September 20, 2005. Jamey
Wright got the start and picked up his 8th win against 16
losses, only giving up 1 and 5 hits over 6 innings. Padres
starter Woody Williams didn't fare quit so well, giving up 9
runs before escaping in the second inning. It was the greatest
winning margin in Rockies history, and tied the Yankees for the
most runs scored in a game in 2005. However, the Rockies are
still in last place, 13 games behind the less-than-ordinary
San Diego 8, Colorado 7
eliminated from postseason play
September 19, 2005. The Padres
eeked over the .500 mark with a squeeker over the Rockies on the
strength of a two-homer barrage from their shortstop.
7-1 Win at the BOB Gives Rocks
Another Road Series
Jeff Francis returns to form
Diamondbacks Squeek by, 6-5
Wright On in Relief
Wright wins 7th in 8-7 squeaker
Rockies Win 6-4
Sunny Kim overcomes bad inning
for 5th win
September 13, 2005. Edwin
Jackson of Los Angeles and Sunny Kim of Colorado each had one
bad inning. Jackson's came in the second inning and yielded 6
runs, while Kim's came in the 4th and only accounted for 4 runs.
Battle of Jeffs Won by Dodgers
Jeff Weaver out pitched Jeff
Francis as LA won in a laugher, 7-0
Finally, another Win
Rockies avoid sweep with 7-2
victory on another Aaron Cook gem
September 11, 2005. Aaron Cook
pitched a COMPLETE GAME, 8 hitter, for his 5th straight win,
putting a stop to the Rockies 4 game losing streak. Matt
Holliday crushed a 3-run double to start a 6-run fourth that
gave Cook all the runs he would need. Troy Glaus hit two home
runs to account for all of the Diamondback's runs against Cook
Four losses in a row - pennant
hopes going up in smoke
Diamondbacks Roll over Rockies,
Three losses in a row - pennant
Diamondbacks Roll over Rockies,
Biggest Ticket Sale in Rockies
History - and the dumbest
32 tickets for $99
September 9, 2005. Check the
above ad out, which was clipped from an email sent by the
Colorado Rockies baseball club. Yes, the Rockies are actually
trying to promote tickets, now that their attendance is in the
toilet. Apparently they hired the same marketing people that
Coors used 20 years ago (for those new to Colorado, Coors didn't
advertise, because they didn't have to). Anyway, you can get a
laminated card with your picture on it that will allow you to
buy up to 32 tickets to Value Games in 2006. You just take your
card to the ticket window, or go online and pick out your
ticket, with no additional fees. But it might not be as good a
deal as it first appears. First, you have to sit in the Pavilion
in left field on bench seats. Secondly, you are entitled to one
ticket for each of the 32 Value games, so if you miss one, you
lose. There are no refunds or exchanges. Thirdly, only 500 of
the cards will be sold. Lastly, all of the Rockies home games in
2006 will be played in Portland, Oregon.
On a serious note, why are the
Rockies wasting their time and money on gimmicks like this that
will not bring large crowds to the game, build fan loyalty, or
increase profits? They would make more money by letting people
in free after the 5th inning. Thousands more would come to the
games and concession sales would double. And, many of those
"freebies" would eventually become paying customers. Or, why not
use some of the hundreds of tried-and-true methods that other
Major League teams have been using for over a hundred years?
What would be wrong with that?
Road Magic Gone?
3-2 in 10 innings
Rockies Lose, Assure Losing
Francis and Rockies fall to
Rockies Narrow the Gap to 12
with 25 Left to Play
Helton and Cook are the heroes
in 6-5 win
September 6, 2005. Aaron Cook
held the Padres while Todd "Pops" Helton delivered the blows.
Remember 1964? The Phillies were ahead by 10 games with only 12
to play and managed to lose anyway. The Padres are that kind of
team. If the Rockies can win 17 or 18 or their last 25, who
knows? Of course its impossible, but we can dream can't we?
Speaking of the Phillies, by the way, they are on the verge of
another collapse of Philadelphian proportions. After leading the
Wild Card race and closing on the Braves, they have lost 5 in a
row, including 3 to Houston, to fall behind the Astros by 2 and
a half games. They have lost 13 in row to the Astros, now, with
former Houston closer appearing to help the Astros more than the
Phils. Strange, how last year they had a former Brave who
couldn't get any Braves out. Billy Wagner not only has been
giving up huge hits to his former teammates, but he has been
letting them steal bases to win. Someday there will be a Philly
team that overcomes adversity rather than creating it for
themselves. No, probably not.
Colorado Sweeps Dodgers
Hawpe singles in the winner in
September 4, 2005. Brad Hawpe
has returned with a vengeance. For the second straight game, he
has contributed mightily in Colorado victories over the once
mighty LA Dodgers. Today, Hawpe singled Corey Sullivan in from
second with the winning run in the 10th. Sullivan had 4 hits on
the day, and was on second after doubling. Zach Day started for
the Rockies and got no decision after holding the Dodgers to 2
runs through 5 innings. Scott Dohmann (2-1) threw a scoreless
10th for the win. Colorado is now only 13 games behind San
Diego, losers at Milwaukee.
Crushed Dodgers, Anyone?
Rockies Dump Dodgers at home, 11-1
September 3, 2005. Brad Hawpe
and Garret Atkins homered and Byung Hyun Kim pitched his second
brilliant game in a row as the Rockies again scored 11 runs to
beat Los Angeles. In the first two games of the series, the
Rockies have outscored the Dodgers 22 to 4.
Rockies Continue Pennant Push
Dump Dodgers at home, 11-3
September 2, 2005. Todd Helton
cranked two out and Garret Atkins had a three-run blast on the
the night that Brad Hawpe and Clint Barmes returned from the DL.
Sunny Kim pitched well for the Rockies, while Jeff Weaver stunk
for the Blue.
Bay Area Bombers Rock Rockies -
Colorado Finally Loses a Road Series
Four homeruns bury Francis and
August 31, 2005. Jeff Francis made a few little mistakes, but
unfortunately they all flew out of there like ducks when the
shotguns are blooming. Rockies manager Clint "Rube" Hurdle has
come upon a new method to avoid taking responsibility for
anything - "consistency". After using a different lineup in
every game so far, he has decided that, in the name of stability
and consistency he will play the same people everyday from now
on. Now he can just make copies of the lineup card with the
pitchers spot blank and fill that in at game time. Then, during
the game, he can just lie down on the bench in the dugout and
take a 9 inning nap. That's what he did today, when a little
managing might have won the game.
The Rockies have now lost 81 games, meaning they can't have a
winning season. Fortunately, that doesn't mean they still can't
win the Western Division.
DeJean Sabotages Aaron Cook
Another close one that they
should have won but didn't have what it took when needed to be
August 30, 2005. Mike DeJean couldn't hold a 2-1 lead in the
ninth and Cook watched another great job dissolve into another
smelly loss. But wait a minute! What was DeJean doing in there?
He's not the closer! Clint?
Rockies 2, Giants 1
Kim gets first road win in 7
August 29, 2005. "Homerun" Holliday is finally living up to his
nickname, and Byung-Hyun Kim is pitching lights out as the
Rockies continue on their stretch drive for the NL West title.
The winning run scored in the top of the fourth when Todd Helton
walked, advanced to second and third on Holliday and Garret
Atkins singles, and scored when Dustan Mohr hit into a double
play. Kim pitched 7 innings yielding a lone run and no walks.
Mike DeJean threw a scoreless 8th and Brian Fuentes put up a
zero in the 9th for the save. The Rockies are now only 12 and a
half games behind San Diego with 31 yet to play.
Padres Shun Sweep
Former Rockie Pedro Astacio
August 28, 2005. The Padres dealt a blow to the Rockies pennant
chances by eeking out a victory by the narrowest of margins in
San Diego. "This was a big
win for us. We didn't need to get swept by these guys,"
said Padres outfielder Ryan Klesko with obvious disrespect for
the resurgent Mile High squad. He'll be choking on those words
when Colorado passes them in September.
"Pops" Pops Padres
Todd "Pops" Helton Grand Slam
beats San Diego 4-2
August 27, 2005. Helton launched a Grand Salami when he reached
out and poked an opposite field dinger on a 3-1 pitch in the
fourth inning. It was all the Rockies got or needed, as Sun-woo
Kim, Jose Acevedo, Scott Dohmann, and Dave Cortes held the Pads
to two runs. Cortes got the save, his 2nd.
Last Place Rocks Beat West
Francis Pitches Well Enough
August 26, 2005. Jeff Francis gave up only two runs in 6 and 2/3
innings and timely hitting and San Diego errors did the rest as
the Rockies edged by 4-3. Thus they begin one of the greatest
comebacks in Baseball history, 14.5 games back on August 25th to
the pennant. And they will do it while posting a losing record!
How's that for excitement, Rockies fans?
Colorado 5, Los Angeles (Dodgers) 4
Homers kill Dodgers and Brad
August 25, 2005. Matt "Homerun" Holliday had a 3-run jack, and
Dustan "Less" Mohr and Aaron "4 minute" Miles added solo blasts
to account for all of the Colorado run in another 1-run road
win. Aaron Cook (3-1) won his third in a row with a 5-inning,
Miles Beats Dodgers, 2-1
Gonzalez Injury Proves
August 24, 2005. Aaron "4 minute" Miles drove in a run and
scored the winner, then preserved the victory with a great play
at second base. But for
some reason Clint and the gang of idiots running the Rockies
don't like Miles and plan to ditch him in the off season. If he
keeps playing like he did today, Rube and the boys will look
even stupider than they do already, if that's even possible.
Byung-Hyun Kim pitched 6 and 2/3 scoreless innings for the
Rockies, giving up only 3 hits to a dazed and confused Dodger
team embroiled in a race scrum and an injury-fest that seems to
have kicked the life out of them. It is only a matter of time
before the Rockies pass them in the standings.
Wright Off Again
LA stomps Colorado, 8-3
August 23, 2005. Jamey Wright gave up 6 runs in the same
number of innings and probably pitched himself right out of the
starting rotation. Clint Hurdle, the Rockies temp manager, will
probably not start Wright again because he is now tied for Major
League lead in losses. Hurdle hates to have any benchmarks that
people can point at and reflect badly on him. Sorry, Clint,
you're not going to fool anyone into believing you have a clue.
Comeback City - Rockies Beat
Rockies bats flame out, Burn
Maddux and Cubbies, 9-7
August 21, 2005. It was a typical Coors (Molson) Field
homerfest, with eight of the big flies leaving the park, four
for each side. The surprising part was that 3 of the Rockies
blasts came off of Greg Maddux, the sure first round Hall of
Famer who still pitches better than practically everyone but the
Rocket. This is the benchmark game that has turned the Rockies
around. Now they will make a run at the NL West pennant, with
the greatest comeback in history, winning on the last day of the
Aaron Cook disappoints Cub
fans, Rox win 4-2
August 20, 2005. Aaron Cook continued his comeback by going 7 innings and
only giving up 1 run on 7 hits. Mike DeJean pitched the eighth
and allowed a run before getting out of a bases-loaded jam. Brian Fuentes
finished up with a scoreless ninth. Dustan "Less" Mohr knocked
in 2 runs with a third inning single and an eighth inning homer,
his 14th. Todd Helton singled home a run in the first, before an
error allowed the second one to stake the Rockies to a rare
How is Shawn Chacon Doing?
August 20, 2005. Chacon has appeared in 6 games for the New York
Yankees, and has a 2-1 record with a 1.64 ERA! Needless to say,
the Bronx Bombers are very happy to have him, especially in
light of what they gave up to get him. See you in the post
Visiting team feels at home in
August 19, 2005. The park fielded a big crowd, but the afternoon
game felt eerily like it was at the friendly confines of Wrigley
Field rather than Molson Field. Of the 30,175 in attendance, it
looked like the 175 comprised the entire contingent of Rockies
supporters. The rest wore their Cub blue and either cheered
every play by their beloved Cubbies, or jeered at their
mistakes. They even threw the ball back when the Rockies Jorge
Piedra hit a homerun, just as they would have done back home in
the Windy City. Once again, the Rockies mis-management were
reminded that winning alone does not make a successful baseball
Shut Out Again
Wright picked wrong night to
pitch; Rockies lose 2-0
August 17, 2005. Jamey "Boomerang" Wright continues to live up
to his nickname, bouncing back from some horrific starts to put
in seven innings of practically flawless hurling. Unfortunately,
the offense was not interested in contributing, so Wright and
the Wrockies lost, two-zip. Even worse, the opposing pitcher
knocked in both runs with a bases-loaded single. I guess he was
the only one who avoided the spell of the humidor.
Blake Street Breakout
Brewers win 6-4
August 16, 2005. Rockies ace Jeff Francis had another bad day in
Denver. If he keeps this up, we won't be able to call him "ace"
anymore. On the other hand, if he's too good, they'll trade him,
so he's got to find a happy medium.
Blake Street Breakout
Slump, what slump? Rox Roll
August 15, 2005. Milwaukee's ace pitcher Ben Sheets started the
game 8 and 8 with a 3.02 ERA and ended it 8-9 with a 3.54 ERA
after being bombed by the Rockies to the tune of 10 runs on 13
hits. Colorado finally awoke from the long slumber at home and
went totally nuts. Helton led the parade with 3 hits, and
Holliday, Atkins, Mohr, and Quintanilla each chipped in 2.
Helton and Atkins also launched big flies into the cool Colorado
Nationals Complete Sweep
9-2 defeat looks like the
others, down 9-0 before finally scoring
August 14, 2005. Jose Acevedo only went 5 and gave up 7 runs,
after retiring the first 9 batters he faced. The home team
scored a combined 4 runs in the 3-game series, the worst in
history. Aaron Miles and Luis Gonzalez knocked in the Colorado
runs, and Todd Helton and Jorge Piedra scored them. Piedra and
Jamey Wright had Friday's RBIs and Piedra and JD Closser scored
the runs. This makes Jorge Piedra the overwhelming offensive
hero for the Rockies in the series, with 2 RBIs and 1 run
scored. Give that man a cigar!
Rockies Shut Out
Armas, bad fundamentals doom
Rockies to only sixth home shutout in club history
August 13, 2005. For the first time in 99
home games, the Rockies were shut out by an opponent. And it
didn't have to happen. With 13 hits, the home team had plenty of
opportunities to score runs, but didn't seem to want it bad
enough to try. The increasingly frustrated fans shouted out a
number of suggestions to Hurdle, but the Rockies manager was
oblivious, as usual. It's just as well, since some of them were
physically impossible, and probably wouldn't have helped anyway.
Pesky Nats Sting Park Avenue
4-2 loss spoils good outing by
August 12, 2005. A familiar pattern exists with these
young Rockies. They frequently get behind early by a few runs
and appear to completely lose interest in the game. Today's game
was a perfect example. After falling behind 3-0 in the first,
the team played as if they couldn't wait to put it behind them
and do something else. In spite of what seemed like constantly
having runners in scoring position with less than two outs,
Rockies hitters never showed any inclination to try to bring
them in. Or maybe no one ever told them what to do with runners
in scoring position. Either way, it isn't much fun to watch.
It's a good thing Hurdle never does or he would be as frustrated
as the fans.
Pirates Pummel Rockies Pitching
Colorado absorbs 11-3 drubbing,
lose 2 out of 3 to lowly Pittsburgh
August 11, 2005. Jeff Francis gave up 6
runs in the first inning and nine in just over 3 innings, during
which qualified for a bad day at Molson Field, where Francis has
had mostly good days this season. "He was
mediocre in Arizona and he was worse than that today," said
manager Clint "Rube" Hurdle in an apparent attempt to rub salt
in the wounds of the future star. Remember that, Jeff, when they
offer you a mediocre contract sometime soon.
Rockies Win in
Helton scores winner on Holliday single in 6-5 victory
Colorado Comes Back to Earth
Hurdle punishes Acevedo,
leaving him out to dry as Pirates beat him up, 12-4
August 9, 2005. Jose Acevedo has been pitching well and making
himself available whenever his manager needed him. As a reward,
Clint "Rube" Hurdle, erstwhile candidate for worst manager of
the year, watched Acevedo lose his stuff, but left him out there
to get bombarded by the Pirates. Nine runs and 12 hits later,
Hurdle finally let the exhausted hurler off the hook. Its great
to "take one for the team once in a while, but a good manager
should try to preserve the pitcher's self-respect, not to
mention his ERA and health. Dodging line drives can be hard on
But hey, it's only the fourth loss in the last 11
games, so it's all good. Unless your name is Jose Acevedo.
Are the Rockies the Hottest
Team in Baseball?
Doubleheader sweep over Marlins,
4-3, 5-3, leave RocKies 7-2 in their last 9
August 8, 2005. Dustan Mohr made a great catch of foul drive in the 11th, then whacked a walk-off dinger in the first
game, to make a winner of the resurgent Scott "Doh!" Dohmann.
The Rockies started Kims in both games, with Sunny Kim just
acquired on waivers from Washington in the first and Byung
Hyung Kim in the second.
Back to Back
Road Wins Again!
Two in a row again with a 14-7 laugher
August 6, 2005. Every Rockies starter had a hit and scored a
run, but Arizona's sloppy play handed them the game on a silver
Three for Four on the Road
Rockies Bunt 'Backs, 6-4
August 5, 2005. If you can't hit, bunt it and hope for errors, which is
exactly what happened as Arizona couldn't handle the nubbers allowing the tieing run to score and the winning tally to get on base.
Hurdle Blows Rockies Chance for
a Road Sweep
August 4, 2005. You could just see the scene
from “The Natural”. The curmudgeon owner furiously paced around his
luxury box because his team, against all odds, was winning a big
game. He stomps to his desk and angrily punches the buttons that
ring the dugout phone next to his management stooge. “Do something,”
he growls, “If they win this game, the whole season could get out of
Hurdle hangs up the phone and calls the
bullpen. “I’m getting Williams!” he whines, and quickly hangs up the
phone and leaps up the steps to the playing field. As he sprints to
the pitcher’s mound, he waves his left hand toward the bullpen.
Meanwhile, the Giants’ announcers in the booth are incredulous,
because the batter is Lance Niekro, a right-handed hitter who is
much better, as are most righties, when batting against left-handed
pitchers. In fact, Niekro is hitting .341 with 8 homeruns against
port siders, and only .221 with 2 homeruns against right-handed
throwers. So, by bringing in Larry Williams, the Rockies’ skipper
was giving the batter a greater than 50% better chance of getting a
hit than if the pitcher was left-handed.
Sure enough, Niekro hits a two-run double and
the Giants win, 6-4 breaking the Rox 3 game win streak and spoiling
a chance for a road sweep which would have been the first time since
September 9, 2004.
More Inaccurate Reporting from
the Denver Post
August 4, 2005. In today’s Post
Sports Section, in describing the Philadelphia Phillies victory over
the Chicago Cubs, the Post printed that the winning run scored on a
passed ball. The box score on the previous page, however, shows no
passed balls by either side. The winning run actually scored when
Jimmy Rollins of the Phils stole home after Cubs catcher Michael
Barret threw the ball to third trying to pick him off. Granted, the
story was a feed from the Associated Press, but you would think that
someone at the Post at least checked the stories for accuracy before
blindly printing them, wouldn’t you?
A later AP story described the
play thusly: “A
mental mistake by Michael Barrett allowed the winning run to score
in the ninth inning Wednesday night, and the Cubs lost 4-3 in
Philadelphia. Barrett had Jimmy Rollins trapped between third and
home after Pat Burrell struck out with the bases loaded, but the
catcher threw to third too soon, giving the speedy Rollins an
opening to dash to the plate. Burrell swung and missed wildly on a
full count for the second out, but Barrett couldn't handle the pitch
cleanly and was charged with a passed ball. Rollins broke for home
when the ball squirted away, then stopped about 40 feet from the
plate as Barrett picked it up. But after the rushed throw to third,
the return toss from Aramis Ramirez was too late.”
The corrected account also
mentions a passed ball, but it obviously did not result in the
winning run being scored.
Three in a Row! Back to Back
Colorado wins two in a row in San
Francisco? Pinch me, it can't be true!
August 3, 2005. "Don't Wake" Kim is doing his best Sandy Koufax
imitation, beating the Giants by the Bay. And Ryan Shealy and
Juan Gonzalez hitting consecutive homeruns in the second inning?
Unbelievable! Next thing you know, they'll complete the sweep.
Barry Bonds must be rolling over in his grave.
Stupid, Stupider, Stupidest -
Owners Losing It
Rox management still whining
August 3, 2005. Charlie Monfort won't let it go, the Post can't
get the numbers right, and nobody cares about the fans. Make no
mistake about it, the Boston Red Sox are a class act. In the
wake of all of the recriminations and bawling by the Rockies
about a trade they were counting on and the Sox barely even knew
about, Boston President Larry Lucchino offered to reimburse half of
the cash that Colorado paid to Baltimore in the Byrnes/Bigbie
deal. Can you imagine that? After Monfort called them crooks in
the media, they are still willing to be gracious. Monfort
responded by compounding the boneheaded actions of his
management goon squad by turning the dough down, ostensibly "on
principle". The principle must be a determination to always make
the stupidest and most self-destructive move possible.
in yesterday's edition, the Post said the amount was $200,000,
but today it was mysteriously reduced to $150,000. They surely
knew of the inconsistency, but didn't bother to explain it.
So, Monfort and
his gang of flunkies has succeeded in leaving the impression
that they got stuck with a bad player they don't want, which
should excite the fans. And the head meatbrain turned down a
free 75 or 100 thousand dollars that could have been used to
make the year a little better for the fans, even if they only
used it to replace all of those broken cup holders in the cheap
seats. For a team as cash-strapped as Monfort claims the Rockies
are, to turn down that much money is a crime.
The truth is
that the Rockies got exactly what they wanted, even if they
didn't realize it. Byrnes is signed to two years for $3 million
plus after this year, in which he is getting $2.2 million.
Bigbie is getting $380,000 this year and has a great deal of
potential as befits a first round draft choice. He has good
speed and power and could blossom into a star if he played for a
team that had a clue how to be a winner instead of a whiney
Rockies Win in SF!
First division road win since
September 29, 2004
August 2, 2005. Jamey Wright pitched well and Matt Holliday hit
the winning homer
Brilliant pitching by Francis, one
big offensive inning yield 9-2 victory, avoid sweep
July 31, 2005. Charlie Manual, the Phillies manager, must have
caught a case of that dreaded Coors Field Coma disease that
haunted Don Baylor and has now spread to "Rube" Hurdle. You know
the symptom - sitting on the bench humming softly while out on
the mound the pitcher falls completely to pieces giving up runs
in boatloads. The only thing that shook Baylor/Hurdle out of it
was the fans chanting "Take him out!", or in one case, the
pitcher throwing the ball over the backstop in frustration,
prompting the umpire to do the manager's job. Manual didn't have
a wake up call as he slept through the fifth inning and Philly
starter Jon Lieber went from pitching a no-hitter to giving up 9
Ignominious Defeat, Part IV
Phillies Withstand Rockies, 8-7
Ignominious Defeat, Part III
Phillies Withstand Rockies, 5-3
Rockies Brass Bungles Trade
It's all rocket science to Rockies
August 1, 2005. What's more pathetic than a multi-millionaire
whining to the press that somebody welshed on a deal? Not much,
actually. Its hard to imagine how a bunch of supposedly
competent executives, as the Rockies top brass style themselves,
could pull the trigger on their part of the deal when the other
party was hedging their bets by saying it was contingent on
approval of upper management. "We felt it was a formality," moaned Monfort.
So, the Rockies traded Eric Byrnes
and $200,000 to Baltimore for Larry Bigbie, thinking that Boston
would take Bigbie off their hands in exchange for catching
prospect Kelly Shoppach and minor league outfielder Adam Stern.
But, the Boston Brass decided not to make deal, much to the
surprise of Monfort and the Meatheads.
"I am very,
very disappointed in how the Red Sox handled the situation. I
will talk with the commissioner, believe me. World Champions? If
that's what it takes to be a World Champion, then people are
right, we may never be one, because we don't operate and treat
other organizations like that," Charlie M sobbed through
We can only
see a few things wrong with this whole event:
managers don't make tentative deals with underlings.
business people don't make deals on faith, they get it in
with a lick of sense performs their part of the deal, which
can't be reversed, before the other party signs an
Successful people don't whine about their failures to the
Rockies got rid of a potential star player (20 HR, 73 RBI,
.283 Avg. in 2004), who had already garnered a following,
and was a favorite of the national press.
Rockies got a 27 year-old player that had already been a
disappointment in Baltimore. If the deal had gone through,
they would have gotten Stern, who is a Juan Pierre type -
speed with no power - that the Rockies don't want or need.
In addition, they would get Shoppach, who is an excellent
defensive catcher, with good power and no speed. If that's
what they were looking for, they should have kept Henry
Blanco. On second thought, isn't that Danny Ardoin?
Byrnes looks like a better player than Bigbie, why did the
Rockies throw in $200,000 in cash?
their whole plan (purportedly) is to build from within, why
are they trying to make these stupid trades for marginal
players in the first place? Do they think they are going to
make a last minute run for the division?
Chacon Traded to Yankees
Home grown youth movement, what
home-grown youth movement?
July 28, 2005. Putting a lie to all of their public statements,
the Rockies traded the 27-year old Rockies-developed former All
Star, Greeley-bred Shawn Chacon, he of the team-best 4.07 ERA,
to the New York Yankees for two Double A pitchers and financial
considerations. Yes folks, it was a purely monetary deal, and
now the Rockies' owners, better known as meatheads, have traded
two of the crown jewels of their "Youth Movement", players
signed to multiyear deals because of their importance to the
organization, namely Joe Kennedy and Shawn Chacon. Perhaps they
have changed their plan to "build from without" without telling
Ignominious Defeat, Part II
Phillies Withstand Rockies, 8-5
July 28, 2005. It took a couple of missed catches in the
outfield, bobbled chances in the infield, one contested call at
first base, and a multitude of bad Hurdle moves, but the Rockies
finally managed to beat themselves Thursday night at Molson
Field. You won't see any of it in the box score, but these were
two lifeless teams determined to lose at any cost. The Rockies
wanted it more and were willing to go to any length to insure
that the outcome disappointed the surprisingly numerous and
Hurdle was the start of the show, carefully crafting each
management decision to do the most damage to his young team
blindly grasping for victory. First, he left an obviously spent
Byung Kyung Kim in the game until he gave up 5 runs. Then he
pulled his replacement while he was pitching well to replace him
with someone who wasn't. Then, for some reason known only to
himself, he inserted Mike DeJean when the game was on the line
instead of the closer. But his true work of genius was using 3
consecutive pinch hitters in the 8th inning, all of whom were
worse hitters than the batters for whom they were substituted.
As a further consequence, Dustan "Less" Mohr, who pinch hit in
the 8th for Sullivan, misplayed a fly ball by Philadelphia's
Chase Utley that resulted in a 2-RBI double, virtually wrapping
up the game for the Phil's and their primo closer, Billy Wagner,
who retired the Rockies in order in the 9th. JD Closser, who
struck out as a pinch hitter in the eighth for Danny Ardoin (who
was having a superb defensive game, throwing out two runners on
the team with the highest stealing percentage in the Majors),
also had a passed ball in the 9th that probably allowed one of
the two runs that scored on Utley's double. In short, not only
was every Hurdle substitution ill-advised, they all backfired on
him. He also made the cardinal mistake of using all of his
position players in 8th, leaving him no one to pinch hit for the
pitcher in the 9th, had it been necessary.
Mets Swamp Rockies, 9-3
July 27, 2005. Now Helton's absence is starting to show, but
even the Todd of old can't help you when your starter, in this
case Jamey "Something's not" Wright, gives up 9 runs by the
fifth inning. The worst news was, with the loss, Colorado stands
at 36 up and 64 down after 100 games, tying the 1993 expansion
Rockies, a manifestly bad team, badly managed. However, the
current Rockies are bound to pull ahead of the expansion team in
the next two weeks, because the 1993 team was in the 4th game of
a 13-game losing streak then.
"Pops" Gone, Rox Win Anyway
Beat Mets, 4-3
July 26, 2005. Helton couldn't play, but Colorado won anyway.
Another Home Win!
Beat Mets, 5-3, More Bad Luck
July 25, 2005. Todd "Pops" Helton continues to act prematurely
old, as he strains his left calf running to first base for
today's bad luck moment. This "Todd and the Toddlers" BS, has
gone right to his head and he's performing like a 40-year old
plus player, along with all of the injuries and diminished
performance. Since the Meatmen don't plan on winning in the
foreseeable future, they should move Helton to someplace where
he can get comfortable and go back to being a young superstar,
and maybe win a World Series. They could use the money to give
themselves a raise and buy another gaggle of mediocre young
players and pretend it's a youth movement. Oh, yeah, and Acevedo
pitched fairly well and the Rockies beat the Mets.
Chacon Bad Luck Continues
Pirates cruise, 3-0
July 23, 2005. "Last Chance" Chacon pitched well again and lost,
as usual, as the Rockies hitters all dreamed about their return
to that hitter's paradise, Molson park, and forgot they had a
game today. Still, it was the best road trip in recent memory,
as they actually won 3 games!
Another Road Win!
Helton Blast Beats Bucs, 5-3
July 22, 2005. Todd "Pops" Helton ripped a two-run dinger into
the right field seats to put the Rocks ahead in the top of the
tenth. The lead held up on a magical night of firsts - the first
extra inning game Colorado has won in four tries, and the first
career save for David "Corty" Cortes.
the usual bad news reared its ugly head to curb tonight's
enthusiasm: The team learned that Jason Jennings had fractured a
finger during a slide in Thursday's game and would be lost for
Back to Normal
Rockies lose, 8-1
July 21, 2005. Jeff Frances stumbled through five, giving up
seven runs. The offense got 10 hits, but practically none when
it counted, and a mediocre (at best) Pirate team cruised over
Colorado in a laugher. Ho-hum, status quo again.
Rockies Win First Road Series at
Eek out 9th road win, 3-2
July 20, 2005. Groucho Marx came back from the other side to
script this one. First Livan Hernandez, the ace of the Nationals
staff plunks Desi Relaford with a pitch providing a free pass to
first base. Yes, that Desi, the one who hasn't even smelled a
hit in his last 29 feeble attempts. Then, Mighty JD Closser, the
.207 hitter that isn't nicknamed "Just Defense" for grins,
blasts a homer to give the worst team in baseball,
possibly in baseball history, a 3-2 lead and eventual victory
over the first place team in the National League East, the best
division in baseball.
played with Marx Brothers spirit, with spectacular errors and
base running blunders. In the end, the woeful blundering Rockies
won the series against the Nationals, two games to one, proving
that if you give a bad team 45 games, they will be able to win 2
of 3 once.
Nationals know what "slump" means. After the game, the
distraught DC starter Hernandez talked about not pitching again
for the rest of the year. A loss to the Rockies will have that
effect on you. You don't want to be a Nationals player for the
next few days in Frank Robinson's clubhouse, believe me. It will
be about as hospitable to the players as Congress is to
Democrats these days.
More bad luck
followed the Rockies, as usual, with starter Jason Jennings
injuring two fingers on his throwing hand with an awkward slide,
and reliever Juan Acevedo spraining his ankle. Both will be
examined tomorrow to determine what action is necessary.
Chacon pitches well but Rox lose 4-0
July 19, 2005. Shawn Chacon pitched well, giving up only 2 runs in 7
innings. But bad luck follows bad teams and the Rockies had
their share of it. It started with the whole team weakly
managing just 4 hits, all singles. Then, Jeff Baker was hit in
the thumb while running the bases, and may have suffered a
season-ending break. Matt Holliday just made it back after
breaking a finger while performing the stupidest play in
baseball - the headfirst slide. But Holliday's return wasn't exactly
triumphant, as he managed to do nothing in four trips to the
plate, including 2 strikeouts. He did say it was feet-first slides only in the future.
Preston Wilson's fortunes have changed, however, as he now plays
for a team that does "the little things right". Wilson proved
that by scoring the Nat's first run showing nearly blazing speed
while scoring from first on a double. Ironically, Wilson spoke
of doing anything to win after the game, while Holliday was
whining about playing hard not being worth the risk. Ever since
Hurdle took over, the Rockies have looked and sounded like
losers, and lived up to it on the field.
Rockies Beat Nats 5-4
Another road win over 1st place club
July 18, 2005. It seems that the Rockies can only win on the
road against teams in first place. After losing 3 in a row to
lowly Cincinnati, Colorado went into the Nation's Capital and
beat the NL East leading Washington Nationals.
winning run scored in the ninth inning on the second error of
the game by former Rockies superstar Vinnie Castilla.
The Rockies 8
road wins now include 2 over first place St. Louis, and one each
over then first place Baltimore and Washington. Other road
victims include Florida, Chicago Cubs, Philadelphia, and
Pittsburgh. Only the Pirates have a losing record.
Traded Wilson Slaps Rockies
July 18, 2005. Former Rockies center fielder Preston "Presto"
Wilson was quoted as saying about his new team, Washington
can definitely see it. The little things get done a lot more
here. It's more business-like. It's about baseball. Guys enjoy
themselves, but there's nothing else besides baseball being
The obvious inference is that the Rockies:
Not much of a surprise, actually. Let's see,
take two meat packers and a trucking company executive, put them
in charge of a baseball team and hire an ex-football player with
no experience as president, a general manager with no clue, and
hire a manager with no previous experience. What do you get? A baseball team that doesn't know how to play, let alone win.
Bruce Whitley contributed to this item.
July 17, 2005. Maybe there is hope for baseball in Denver yet.
Without Klueless Klis denigrating the game, the team, the
stadium, and everything else about baseball in this town,
perhaps it can regain its reputation here.
Reds complete sweep, 9-4
a lot of help from Clint Hurdle
July 17, 2005. Jamie Wright pitched 5 scoreless innings to begin
Sunday's road game at Cincinnati.
In the sixth
inning, got the first two batters, then gave up homeruns to
Shawn Casey and Ken Griffey, Jr. Any other manager might have
taken these two blows as a hint that Wright was tiring and
should be pulled.
batter doubled, but did Rockies' manager Clint "Rube" Hurdle
view that as an indication that Wright should be pulled? Nah.
Instead, he showed that he didn't think Wright could get the
next batter out by ordering Jamey to walk Adam Dunn, a .242
hitter who had been hitless today. At that point, you had to
figure that Hurdle's next move would be to bring in a relief
"Rube" sat on his hands and watched Wright walk Wily Mo Pena.
After that, even the stupidest manager in baseball history, Don
Baylor, would have pulled Wright. But not Hurdle. On the next
pitch, Javier Valentin hits a Grand Slam Homerun. Game, set
Rockies participation in All Star Game nil
July 12, 2005. The only Rockies representative at the All Star
Game in Detroit didn't play. Relief pitcher
Frances suffers first career loss at home
July 10, 2005. The Padres out slugged the Rockies at Molson the
win the rubber game of the series, 8-5.
Lowest Scoring Game Ever!
First complete 1-0 game in Denver Major League history
July 9, 2005. Jason Jennings contributed 7 spotless frames and
Jay Witasick and Brian Fuentes completed the shutout as the
Rockies won the lowest scoring game in Molson Fields' history.
The Rockies also won the only previous 1-0 game in Denver on
August 10, 1994, but that game was called after 6 innings. It
took 847 games at the current stadium to produce the one run
game, the longest spell in Major League history. That says a lot
about Rockies' pitching, doesn't it?
The only run
of the game was scored by Aaron Miles on a double by Luis
Gonzalez. Miles had reached on a perfect bunt single, something
he had worked on diligently in the off-season. Coincidentally,
the Philadelphia Phillies had the first 1-0 game in their new
stadium on the same day - but, in the second year.
loaded the bases with one out in the sixth and two out in the
ninth but were unable to score.
Padres Romp 12-2
July 8, 2005. Jamey Wright had
and off day, as did the entire Rockies offense other than Preston
Wilson, who crashed a 2-run homerun in the first inning to account
for all of Colorado's runs.
July 7, 2005.
July 6, 2005.
Frances throws gem as Rockies beat Dodgers 6-1
Rookie Phenom Barmes Out for the Season!
Broken collarbone in mysterious circumstances
June 8, 2005. It took 9 screws and a titanium plate to repair
Clint "Basher" Barmes left collarbone. At first, Barmes said he
broke it slipping on the second stair up on the way to his 4th
floor loft carrying groceries he had just bought at the
convenience store attached to his Lodo apartment building. Later
he changed his story, saying he was actually carrying frozen
deer meat, a gift from teammate Todd Helton. Barnes and Brad
Hawpe had spent the afternoon riding ATVs and having dinner at
Helton's Greeley ranch. OK, the Baseball Observer is always
willing to believe, but he's not that gullible, and is waiting
for the real story.
Other 2005 Game Reports
Time Has Run Out!
No more Rockies game in Denver
before the team moves to Portland. If you didn't go to a
If you buy $25 worth of stuff at King Soopers,
and you have a SooperCard, you can buy up to 4 Rockies tickets for $5
each. (Do not construe this as an endorsement of the store
or the card, or the deal, for that matter, which is
significantly worse than in previous years.)
Spend $30 at any Rockies Dugout Store and
they will sell you 2 good seats for $2 ea.
The Baseball Observer Predicts
|2005 WORLD SERIES
beat Red Sox Obviously not going
to happen. The Observer picked 5 of 8 playoff teams,
though not quite in the right positions.
55-107 (.342) and Last Place OK,
The Observer was wrong; the Rockies are a little better
than predicted (actually the division was a lot worse), but still last.
NL: Braves | AL: Red Sox
Probably both right, but Sox
NL: Astros | AL: Twins
Wrong on both counts here, as
the Cards and White Sox won.
NL: Dodgers | AL: Angels
Dodgers out, Angels
NL: Phils | AL: Yankees
Phils chances are fading fast,
Yankees may still make it. In fact, NY won the division
and Boston was the WC. Astros were the NL WC.
NL: Jim Thome
Thome never overcame injuries.
AL: Vladimir Guerrero
Still has a small chance.
AL: Randy Johnson
NL: Pedro Martinez
Both will probably get votes,
but neither will probably win.
NL: JD Closser
AL: Dallas McPherson
Both bad choices, neither has
AL: Terry Francona, Boston
NL: Charlie Manuel, Phillies
The Baseball Observer stands
by both choices, but realistically, neither will
We Couldn't Make This Stuff
March 17, 2003
Rockies Co-Owner Charlie Monfort bet Denver Post hack Mark
Kiszla dinner that the Rocks would win at least 90 games in
2003! Only missed it by 16.
Rockies' management is actually (according to unreliable sources
at the Denver Newspapers) considering building one or more
hyperbaric batting cages under Coors Field so that hitters
can practice hitting under barometric conditions similar to
those at sea level.
"Expecting to Fly"
A quote from Jim Armstrong's Vacuous column in the Sunday,
March 16, 2003 Denver Post:
Rangers manager Buck Showalter, recalling a conversation he
once had with former Rockies coach Ron Hassey. "He told me:
'One of the worst things that happened to us is we got in
the playoffs that first year at Coors Field. A lot of people
don't realize it was a strike-shortened season. If we had
played a full season, we wouldn't have been in the playoffs.
It gave the organization some unrealistic hope.' " ...
More Proof Hurdle is a Buffoon -or- Why the Rockies Don't
February 19, 2003. Troy E. Renck reported this Clint Hurdle
quote in today's Denver Post: "One of my pet peeves is hearing
pitching guys talking about how guys throw in the bullpen.
I was a hitting guy for a long time, and I never went in and
told the manager that we needed to get a guy in the lineup
because he hit well in BP. That dog doesn't hunt with me."
Why the 2003 Rockies are Not Like the 2002 Angels March 28, 2003.
The Denver news media, not to mention the Rockies themselves,
are spending a lot of time trying to convince fans that Colorado
can be successful this year ...
Check out Mudville
Magazine. It's Baseball, and it's kind of funny!
The 2003 Rockies (74-88) finished in 4th place,
11 games behind LA, 10 games behind AZ, 26.5 games behind
SF, 10 games ahead of SD, and 17 games behind Florida in the
Wild Card race.
Let's see how a SUCCESSFUL businessman runs a baseball team
New bonehead play!
TV coverage of the Rockies: how does this year's compare with
See what ESPN
is saying about the Rockies' future...
Monfort wants to own the team forever...
Rockies new lineup brings hope...
BONEHEAD! Everyone tells you when someone makes a great
play. What about the other kind..
Denver Baseball Coverage Continues Decline
2003. Jose Jimenez and Chris Richard are gone...
Reporting in Denver Falls to a New Low
2003. Troy Renck, chief baseball hack for the Denver Newspaper
Ex-Rockies Factor Plays Out in Both Championship Series
2003. Both participants got to the World Series due to the
ERF (Ex-Rockies Factor).
The 2005 (And Last) Colorado
The roster with The Baseball
"Rule 5" Carvajal
"Last Chance" Chacon
Byung-Hyun "Don't Wake" Kim
Spring Training 2005
Colorado Springs 5, Rockies 1
April 2, 2005. Sky Sox stretch their record to 5-2 against parent
Rangers 11, Rockies 7
April 1, 2005. Rockies finish spring 17-14.
White Sox 9, Colorado 8
March 31, 2005.
Cubs 5, Rockies 4
March 30, 2005.
Colorado 4, White Sox 3
March 29, 2005.
Colorado 7, Arizona 3
March 28, 2005.
Colorado 3, Oakland 7
March 27, 2005. Rockies now 15-11.
7, Chicago Cubs 6
March 26, 2005.
Colorado 5, San Francisco 1
March 25, 2005.
Colorado 1, Arizona 3
March 24, 2005. Called after 5 on account of killer bees.
San Francisco 7, Colorado 5
March 23, 2005.
Seattle 12, Colorado 4
March 21, 2005.
Colorado 6, Kansas City 3
March 20, 2005.
Colorado 4, Oakland 3
March 19, 2005.
Colorado 5, Arizona 2
March 18, 2005.
March 17, 2005.
Rockies 5, Angels 2
March 16, 2005.
Texas 1, Colorado 0
March 15, 2005.
Colorado 11, Arizona 8
March 14, 2005.
Chicago 9, Rockies
March 13, 2005.
Brewers 17, Rockies 9
March 12, 2005. In
March 11, 2005. In
March 10, 2005. In
March 9, 2005. In
March 8, 2005. In
Rox Beat Royals 8-7
March 7, 2005. In
Buried By Texas 16-1
March 6, 2005. In
Rockies Beat Angels 7-6
March 5, 2005. In
March 4, 2005. They had a chance, but that old familiar song
began playing in the late innings as the relief pitchers failed to
hold the White Sox, who surged to a 7-5 victory in the Rockies
spring home opener at Hi Corbett field in Tucson.
March 2, 2005. In the first contest of the 13th and final season
for Colorado Rockies baseball, the team cruised to an easy 8 to 4
victory over the Chicago White Sox. Third baseman Jeff Baker was the
hitting star for the Rocks, with a 3-run homerun in the 9th. Baker,
Clemson teammate of San Diego rookie sensation Khalil Greene, hit
.321 with 15 homeruns while splitting the season between single A
Visalia and double A Tulsa in the Rockies farm system in 2004.
Losers for 2004
First Place: Archie, Peyton, and
The beginning of
the year found these three geniuses trying to quietly hold the
National Football League and the San Diego Chargers hostage by
telling them that Eli Manning, the projected number 1 draft pick,
would not play for San Diego if they drafted him. They wanted the
NFL to discreetly arrange for Eli to be drafted by a more acceptable
team, i.e. one in a bigger media market and a better chance to make
it to the Super Bowl than the Chargers, who had a 4 win, 12 loss
record in 2003.
NFL and the Chargers took offense at the sheer audacity and greed of
the trio, and made the whole thing public, humiliating the Mannings.
Then, all three Mannings publicly stated that the Chargers were not
only the worse team in football, but were also liars and charlatans,
and that Eli would never allow them to draft him.
The next picture
we saw, of course, was a smiling Eli holding up a Charger jersey as
the team announced his selection as the first pick of the 2004
Later that day,
the Chargers laughed again, as they traded Eli to the New York
Giants for a package of players and draft picks that could only be
described as robbery, grossly in favor of the Chargers.
Later that year,
the Giants proved to be a poor team, especially so with Eli at
quarterback, where his record stands at 1 win and 6 losses as of the
end of the year.
Still later that
year, Peyton and his team, the Indianapolis Colts, barely managed to
beat the Chargers with a combination of home field advantage and
miraculous lucky breaks, in overtime, by a field goal, putting to
rest the Manning’s contention that the 12-4 Chargers are a grossly
inferior team. Ironically, had Eli played for the Chargers, this
would probably have been a triumphant moment for the family, with
the two leading quarterbacks in football, and brothers, going head
to head on the road to the Super Bowl. Instead, experts are
predicting that Eli will never be a top quarterback because the
Giants system is not designed to feature that position
(coincidentally San Diego’s system does feature the quarterback, and
Eli would have been given the starting job).
To add insult
to injury, Peyton Manning surpassed the mark for number of touchdown
passes in a season, but experts are saying that record is tainted
because new rules this year make it much more difficult for teams to
defend the pass. As a further irony, the all-time touchdown wizard
couldn't manage even one in the 20-3 blowout playoff loss to the
Patriots, even though both of the Pat's starting cornerbacks were
injured and did not play, and one of the safeties usually plays wide
Second Place: PeopleSoft
vendor of mediocre-quality ERP software, had maybe the worst year in
corporate history by a company that didn’t go out of business. ERP,
by the way, stands for Enterprise Resource Planning, a euphemism for
a complete company software system that provides programs to control
virtually everything from Accounting to Manufacturing to Payroll,
started the year out by buying a smaller competitor, and paying way
too much, weakening the company financially. Then they spent the
rest of the year stubbornly fighting off a takeover bid by a much
larger company, Oracle. Fighting the merger cost the company over a
billion dollars in sales and millions in legal fees, not to mention
the damage done by neglecting their customers, shaking up their
management, and destroying their public image. They eventually lost
anyway and were taken over by Oracle, at a lower price than some of
the previous offers, thus costing their stockholders even more
money. Oracle promptly fired most of PeopleSoft's management.
Other than that,
PeopleSoft had a great year.
Mention: The Colorado Rockies, for obvious
Bye, Tug. We'll Miss You
January 6, 2004. Tug McGraw, the guy with the cherub-face and the
million dollar smile, who couldn't stop beating his knee with his
glove, or making the big pitch when it counted the most, is gone. He
died yesterday at his son, Tim McGraw's home in Nashville, of brain
cancer at age 59.
These days, with everyone screaming about Pete Rose, more time
should be devoted to guys like Tug, who will never be in the Hall of
Fame, but provided many of the Hall of Fame moments that make
baseball the kind of game that continues to pull at the heartstrings
of its fans, young and old, in spite of the slimy antics of many of
it's protagonists like Rose and the Rockies management, to name but
So long, Tug. I, for one, will miss you a lot.